A key Question to Ask Your Partner When Discussing What Turns You On
Asking your partner about their preference for being "a good or bad boy/girl" can be a key question to discuss when exploring what turns you both on in the bedroom. It may seem like a simple question, but the answer can reveal a lot about your partner's desires and how they want to play with you intimately.
It's important to note that this question has nothing to do with the idea of "good" and "bad" in the traditional sense. It's not about judging someone's moral character or behavior in day-to-day life. Instead, it's about exploring the different types of intimate play that you and your partner may be interested in.
For example, someone who prefers being "bad" may enjoy being called "naughty" or "dirty" during dirty talk and role-playing. They may also enjoy being punished during intimate play, such as being spanked or otherwise physically restrained. On the other hand, someone who prefers being "good" may enjoy being praised and rewarded during intimate play, such as with a sensual massage or other forms of pleasure.
It's important to understand that this preference for "good" or "bad" behavior is a normal part of human psychology. Everyone falls somewhere on this spectrum, and there is no clear cut answer. Some people may be more easily incentivized by the "carrot," while others may respond better to the "stick."
It's also worth noting that this preference may not be consistent across different situations or experiences. For example, someone who prefers being "good" in their everyday life may enjoy being "bad" in the bedroom. It's important to communicate openly with your partner and explore different types of intimate play to see what turns you both on.
Asking this question can be very beneficial even for non-kinky people. It can help you both to explore the different types of intimate play you may be interested in and to understand each other's desires better. It's also a great way to open up the conversation and explore new and exciting ways to play together.
It's important to acknowledge that for many people, talking about sex and intimacy can be difficult and uncomfortable. It's normal to feel nervous or embarrassed when discussing these topics, even with a partner. If this is something that you or your partner are struggling with, it may be beneficial to seek professional help.
A professional who specializes in sex, intimacy and relationships can help you both to communicate more effectively and to explore and understand your desires in a safe and supportive environment. They can also help you to work through any past traumas or negative experiences that may be affecting your intimacy and relationships.
If you're interested in seeking professional help, I offer a free 30-minute discovery call for those who may be seeking assistance. During this call, you can talk to me about your concerns and I can help you to understand how I work and may be able to help you. I understand that talking about intimacy and sex is not easy, but it's important to remember that seeking help is a brave and responsible step towards a happier and more fulfilling intimate life.